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Most people I’ve met who are afraid of intimacy, lose the fear when they accept and feel better about themselves.The question is whether or not the married man will fix this intimacy issue with this wife.The reality is he’s looking for love like the rest of us and afraid of what he’ll find.The ‘other man’ is probably afraid that he won’t be able to ‘handle’ a love relationship with a fully available woman.In other instances his defenses are so thick he doesn’t read the signs at least consciously.Personally, I think most if not all married people know on some level if a spouse is cheating, but that’s just my belief.Too many pieces for stability what you get instead is fragmentation, conflict, and limited intimacy.So let’s look at the type of triangle that has one woman and two men in it.
You are engaged in what is commonly thought of as a ‘triangle.’ Triangles are rough on the heart.
Usually at the beginning of such an arrangement, when the triangle is young so to speak, the ‘other man’ usually tells himself he likes this arrangement because he doesn’t have to make a commitment.
She can go back to her husband when we’re done making love, right? The problem comes when over time an attachment forms between the married woman and her ‘other man.’ Now she is growing used to the arrangement and has convinced herself that the triangle makes her disappointing marriage tolerable.
The ‘other man’ gets painfully left out, not yet knowing that is the best thing that could happen to him.
All three people in this triangular arrangement have their issues.